Vivat, crescat, floreat!

Maybe a temporary move, maybe not, we'll see.  I'm still feeling a little transient in my online life. At least for now moving all posting over to: http://crackerjackheart.wordpress.com/  Come visit, okay?

Vox peeps, I've added most of you to my regular rss reader, so I'll be keeping up with you still.

The internet is fixed.  The sink is not. Work was insane tonight, I got out an hour later than anticipated. I feel like bashing my head into wall, I'm so amped up and completely stressed. Just too many things going on, but a calm night at work would have been welcome.  Instead it was just crazy making. So packed I couldn't even have a beer after to calm down. Augh.  Maybe I should go run around the block or something.

If I can get through May, everything will be awesome. Light at the end of the tunnel. Deep breaths.

Things that are good:

• the girls in my household
• planning my Seattle trip
• my little sister coming to visit in July
• spring weather finally consistently perfect
• small presents from friends
• tzatziki
• amusing horoscopes

I saw Iron Man last night with T-Rider.  When Tim asked this morning, is it was awesome?  I said, no, FUCKING AWESOME.  I am however very conflicted about. Mostly because I can't decide if I want and awesome reactor in my chest so I can be a superhero, or if I want to be Pepper Potts, as my ideal job has always been as an assistant some super rich, eccentric person who will appreciate my wide variety of skills. (Hmm, that sounds somehow dirty when I put it on paper, I mean it all quite honestly and cleanly, you perverts.) I can ignore the gross stereotypes of Middle Eastern Terrorists, as it's been a stock cliché in movies for years now, and I don't see railing about it appearing in a delicious ice cream sundae of a movie, such as Iron Man, is going to change anything at all.  Also there were previews for the new Batman movie and the new Indiana Jones.  Hurrah!  Indeed the only thing possibly missing from summer movies this year is Matt Damon. And of course decent rolls for strong, leading female characters, but I don't feel like ranting about that today.  YAY SUPERHEROES!

I have about ten million things to think about right now, and one is moving this blog to a different host, as I need to test a few out and see how they stack up.  I'm thinking Typepad, as I've ruled out Blogspot and Livejournal.  But Wordpress isn't out of the question.  Anyone else have any suggestions?

And saving the bombs for the end: I gave notice at my day job yesterday.  Yes, I recognize that this is risky move in the current economy.  However, it's sucking away all my creative energy and way more time than it should.  Also, while I don't want to publicly say anything too mean, or revealing, I don't expect the organization to continue to sustain itself for much longer, which would put me out of a job anyway. My last day here, I believe, will be May 27, then I am off to Seattle for a fews, and back to start my new life, however it will play out, in Nashville in June. I have a plan, which will surely be adjusted in the coming weeks, and hopefully keep me afloat and happier.

Hi, how are y'all?

I'm not having a good day.  No, I don't want to talk about it.

Also I'm getting a fairly hideous headache.  And my boss is ten minutes late for our meeting. If he's not here in another five I am going home.

In lieu of my own content, links:

• "At the beginning of the 21st century, the typical American suburb is just about the safest place that has ever existed in the history of the world - yet it's full of terrified people."
• The headline says it better than I could.

Maybe everything would be better if I had one of these:

see more crazy cat pics

I was 45 minutes late to work this morning as I slept in, just a little, and then took forever to get ready, long, long hot shower and all.  Now I am at work, not working, checking emails and birthday wishes.  I smell great, my hair looks good and I am inappropriately dressed for the today's weather but I care not, cuteness wins out on birthdays.  Am wearing: fitted white t-shirt, jean jacket, pretty bird necklace that Holly gave me for my b-day, low-heeled brown platform sandals and a pretty 50s style Mexican peasant skirt in brown with pink ribbon trim and multi-colored flowers embroidered all up the left side that Jami gave me for my b-day.  It's a whole birthday present outfit!  Hooray!  I also got a cute bracelet and an awesome t-shirt from miss Mara, and some Amazon monies from Jed & Brad.  So far, perfect princess day!  Hooray!  Now I just have to stop thinking about myself long enough to get some work done then go work my butt off tonight at the restaurant, as it is Dine Out for Nashville Cares night where lots of people go out and eat and restaurant give part of their sales to Nashville Cares, a community-based AIDS service organization. Which I happy to participate in, and glad of, but couldn't they have made it be a NOT busy night on my birthday.  Alas, it will be fun, surely, and T-Rider gets back today so hopefully I will get to see him for a minute too.

It's so green here now.  It's like there's some flowers, trees are frilled with little feathery chartreuse buds and then FWOOMP! suddenly everything is lush and green.  It's already getting warm.  I wore jeans and cowboy boots to the restaurant last night and thought I was going to die of over heating--of course the AC was out, so that might have had something to do with it. But this morning I put on a skirt, ballet flats and a little shirt and, yeah, I think that's pretty much it for me.  Jeans maybe to bars and sometimes to the restaurant, but it's officially skirt and flip-flip season.  Woo hoo!!

Ama Duende tagged me for this, so here it is:

The rules:

1. Each player starts with 8 random facts/habits about themselves.
2. People who are tagged, write a blog post about their own 8 random things, and post these rules.
3. At the end of your post you need to tag 8 people and include their names.
4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment on their blog and tell them they’ve been tagged, and to come back and read your blog for the whole story.

I'm sure you've all probably seen this in various form around the net, everyone and their brother seems to be reposting it (usually with out credit the original photographer):

What the World Eats, photos by Peter Menzel.  It's a series of pictures of families in different nations, sitting with all their groceries for one week. This was originally emailed to me by a work associate, with the comment, "Don't know about you, but right about now, I'm counting my blessings! Sure glad we live in America."  Really?  Really?  I am seriously appalled that anyone would look at this and take that sentiment away from it.  My immediate response to it is that I have been slacking lately on my personal pledge not buy prepackaged food and to eat more vegetables.  My secondary response to it is that middle class culture, universally, around the world, eats a disgusting amount of non-food items.  This is clearly one more sign/symptom of the decline of western civilization. I am going to eat an apple now.  And then contemplate making my own tortillas and subsequently my own tortilla chips, as that is one of the few packaged foods I cannot live with out. I will, of course, never follow on this contemplation.

Naturally before I was sitting here feeling all high and mighty about this, I was out, earlier this morning, where I bought myself a bunch of make-up and other useless crap.  So later I can go home and make myself feel very very pretty, while simultaneously beating myself up mentally for not being a hairy-legged hippie who could care less about how she looks.  Le sigh. Perhaps as I move into my 35th year my meditations should focus more on accepting and balancing the series of contradictions that I am.

I have actually been thinking about food a lot lately.  I've run across stories about the current global food crisis in a variety of media this week.  I find it really upsetting.  America, the Land of Plenty, people starving in other countries, blah blah blah. Sure, right, who doesn't find it upsetting if they dwell on it? The failure of decent world trade, the crumbling international economies, the terrifying rise of nationalism and conservative ideals in middle class "Western" countries, and very real threat of global climate change are all very clear signs that we have passed a tipping point.  Sure crazy radical revolutionaries like myself have been saying such things since the 70s (and surely earlier) that western civilization will topple, that we are living in end times, that we've too long been living on a bad colonial model and living beyond our means.  I just don't know what is to be done about it. I mean, I live in and am a product of the country and the culture into which I was born.  I am incredibly materialistic, and yet ethically against the very foundations that make that kind of materialism possible for me.  I am, essentially a moral failure, though still incredibly idealistic.  The question is, really, what to do about it?  I mean, I'm not going to run off and live in woods and grow all my food. I can continue to work to be a better person.  But, how much work do I need to do?  Can I be satisfied working in small family-owned business, and working to make small steps in teaching people about energy conservation?  Should I run off work harder to help feed poor kids in other countries? Would it even matter if I did?

Ugh, I anticipated introspection this week, pre-birthday and all.  I wasn't actually expecting to have a moral crisis about how I live my life.  Excuse me, I'll be over here in my designer jeans, putting on eyeshadow and trying to calculate how much I have spent on cosmetics and wondering many months of food I could have purchased for a family in Africa with that cash.  Later I will go out and have fun with my friends and then stick myself with pins for not remembering to feel the suffering of the rest of the world acutely enough. Or perhaps I'll forgo all of that, take up pot smoking as a hobby, and forget I ever worried about any of this.

Pluses and minuses:

+today's outfit is super cute (3)
-my skin looks awful and my hair is kind of tragic today (2)
+got a fuckton of work done today (4)
-got work done at the expense of going to a paid for, swag filled lunch (1)
+lunch was sponsored by hated radio conglomerate, I probably didn't want to go anyway (1)
-several friends are unhappy and having a hard time right now (4)
+have recently done my best to be a better employee (2)
-it's overcast and strange out today (1)
+it's finally consistently warm (3)
-have bunnies to take care of (4)
+have cute bunnies (3)
-have way less time to get everything I want done (5)
+started seeing a nice boy (5)
-he's gone a lot for work (2)
+almost my birthday (2)
-still not being paid to read books, write crap and make jewelry, can't seem to avoid the dreaded 'day job' (3)
+mini vacation in Seattle coming up! (3)
-have to fly on a plane to get there (1)

By this accounting I am ahead by 4, so thus it is mathematically determined that I'm doing good.

How cute is this guy?  That's exactly what Mr. Darcy looked like in my head the first time I read Pride and Predjuduce.  (HA!!  I just read the comments when I went to get the link and apparently not the only one making the Mr. Darcy connection!)

My weekend was too long on the negatives and too short on the actual weekend, though I had a very nice time last night.  Cooked burgers out on the grill and hung out with Big Daddy Sligh and couple folks.  Am now trying to finish up work as quickly as possible, so I can go out and enjoy the sunshine, which in this case, might mean sewing with the door open, so I can finish all my current stacked sewing projects.

Other things I meant to post about but am actually too lazy to go into in depth:

• I'm a bad friend for not visiting my friends enough
• Hives, possibly stress induced, on my face. Or maybe the lack of sneezing means this is how my allergies are manifesting this year?
• New shoes, awesome! Still need sandals, not at all inspired by anything this year, must waste hours looking for something appropriate.
• Birthday one week away.  Have deep thoughts on aging, maybe will share later.
• Sunshine!  I love sunshine!  LOVE LOVE LOVE!
• Going to Seattle May 28-Jun 4. Hopefully have already emailed everyone who really needs to know this.